Jack的小留学生日记 l 英国礼仪

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在英国，有一句古老的谚语：“举止得体才为绅士”，这句话凸显了英国文化对礼仪的重视。伊顿和温彻斯特公学的校长威廉·霍曼（William Horman）在他的著作《伏尔加里亚语》（Vulgaria）中首次提到了这一谚语，该书于1440年至1535年间在英格兰的都铎王朝时期创作。

随着现代社会生活节奏加快，大部分人几乎不会去尊重和保留古老的传统了，传承已久的礼节逐渐淡出我们的生活。但我认为，这种欠缺对传统的敬畏的行为不可取。得体的举止不仅体现出一个人的优良品质，还可以在日常生活中给其他人留下良好印象，也有助于培养自身的良好心态和感觉。

 

对礼仪的重视程度反映了一个漫长而不稳定的文明发展过程，人类为了善逐渐学会克制并摒除人性深处的恶。公元20年，即罗马帝国的巅峰时期，人们的行为举止有了重大转变。当时的人们比从前更加关注个人卫生，从每周至少洗个澡，去除鼻毛到每天多次刷牙预防口臭。男性对女性也礼貌谦让，克制暴力。由于那个时代的人们对牙科知识了解甚少，牙膏的成分也比较随意，在我们现在看来甚至会觉得令人恶心，但是放在那个时代，这种对仪容仪表的重视值得尊敬。

不幸的是，随着罗马帝国的倒台，得体举止似乎也被人们丢弃了。在罗马时期大约1100年后的中世纪，人们又逐渐意识到了它的重要性。在这个时代，一个名为“骑士精神”的新概念被引入欧洲并在男性中逐渐变成主流。即骑士要遏制对妇女的武力和虐待行为，以保护她们的权益和妇女的尊严。在随后的几个世纪中，这些基本的思想逐渐得到完善和进步。

再来说说餐具和礼仪的联系。这是1450年的威尼斯玻璃器皿，这种玻璃器皿非常精致且易碎，人们使用的时候需要谨慎小心。这也侧面反映出仪态优雅和妥当的重要性，而不仅仅是缺乏刚性的柔弱。在16世纪后期欧洲餐桌上也引入了叉子，这更是锻炼和促进我们文明进食的一种方式。

如今，英国的礼节规则源于维多利亚时代。例如，握手，鞠躬，在室内脱下帽子等等。尽管当今社会上最正式的礼节使用的频率要比上个世纪少，但基本的礼仪举止仍然是人们判断一个人品质的重要决定因素。

科学研究表明，我们的第一印象是在访谈和会议中最初互动的七秒内产生的，这是人们下意识做出决定的时候。因此，我们的举止和礼貌显得更加重要。这意味着我们至少握手的时候要平和，谈话的时候要放松，交流的时候面带微笑，该站立时要站直，该坐下时要坐正。

我以后每月都会分享更多关于礼仪着装的信息，期待和大家交流。

Jack

 

英文版

In Britain, an old proverb goes " manners maketh man", which basically means that politeness and good manners are essential to humanity. This proverb first noted down by William Horman, a headmaster at Eton and Winchester College, in his book "Vulgaria", which was written between 1440 and 1535 in Tudor England. Although proper etiquette and manners are slowly fading out of our society as less and less people practice it, we must not fall into the trend of increasing unawareness of civility and good etiquette as it shows the best you have to offer and makes a good impression on others in everyday life which also help you to feel good about yourself and your identity. The history of manners can be seen as a  long and unsteady civilising process, with human beings gradually and painfully learning to tame the beast inside for the sake of propriety and kindness. In the Western Hemisphere, a big breakthrough of manners and proper behaviours was in  20AD, at a high point of the Roman Empire. People are now more focused on hygiene: from having at least a bath a week to removing nasal hair to containing the display of violence and also policing the way men behaves towards women and to brushing our teeth many times a day, conscious of our bad breath. 

However, with little knowledge of odontology and science, the ingredients they used for toothpaste were somewhat random and plainly disgusting to the modern eye, but their mentality is advanced and fascinating. Unfortunately, with the downfall of the Roman Empire, manners and refinement also halted. This was then slowly picked up in the medieval period, around 1100 years after the height of Rome. Here, a new concept called Chivalry is introduced to the courts of Europe: an idea than men need to moderate their force and maltreatment of women to protect both theirs and the women's honour and dignity. In the following centuries, these principle ideas were slowly refined; first with the Venetian glassware in the 1450s which was extremely delicate and easy to break, showing that moderation and elegance are admirable and not just tedious; and also with the introduction of the use of forks in the late sixteenth century Europe, which was a way to temper and guide our appetite. The manners and etiquette rules of Britain today are derived from the ones in the Victorian Era, for example, to shakes hand, to bow, taking hats off indoors, and much more. Though the most formal etiquettes are used less in today's society than, say, in the last century, basic politeness and manners are still a huge determinant of how people view you, both in casual and formal settings.Research has shown that our first impression is made in the first seven seconds of the interaction and in interviews and meetings, this is the time where the interviewer will make their decisions subconsciously, thus making our actions and politeness ever more important. So this means that in Britain, at least we shake our hands firmly with our counterpart while not hugging or touching with our other hand, we relax and smile while we are talking and also stand and sit straightly.

 

More etiquette and attire based posts will be uploaded monthly, see you around. 

Jack

*文章版权归Jack同学所有

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